Tuesday 15th January 2011
Applied for two post-graduate vacancies which are very far from home, far away will be good. I will be looking for more vacancies and applying in local areas too. There is a feeling of being lost again like in the teenage years but I am strong and will cope with whatever challenges I face.
I hope i get a 2:1 in my degree at least.
What else? I feel as every week, month and year goes by I am loosing my friends and especially loosing my bond with my best friend. Dinners and other activities have really not helped as we have a different level of understanding and he don’t talk about anything that is different from before or intellectual. I can probably say I don’t have a best friend anymore or any good friend who is constantly or regular communicating with me and I believe social networking has killed off any friends I had. I don’t mind people doing what’s important in life but its always nice to have a group of friends which you feel your part of but I’m not part of anything.
I guess I’m learning very important lessons as life goes on and I believe people will always call themselves my friends so I’m some benefit to them but I don’t want to be anyones asset. If people keep going on like this then I will always perceive people as another step on a ladder and start using them instead to achieve what I want, I do already think I am in University to achieve the goals I have set myself and not to make any friends. If someone wants to be friendly then fair enough but I don’t care anymore because University is not forever and I am only their to achieve a target in life and move on.It is always nice to make friends along the way for life but you can never force anyone to be your friend and that is fair enough as I know how i’ve endured pain in my life and I am stronger and never given up, others would have given up, no ones ever asked so I’ve never told anyone.
Not down at all about this!
Thanks to anyone who reads this as I am only reporting what I am experiencing and this is a blog to express myself and if someone doesn’t like it then they should not read it or be part of my life. Friends are always their for you when you are up or down!