How to decode her flirting


Experts believe the way she flirts is a clue to her personality. But what is her flirting style telling you?

You might have just met her at a bar, or you may have known her for years. Whichever it is, you’re pretty certain you’ve noticed a flicker of sexual or romantic interest.

But what, exactly, has she done to give you that impression? It’s an important question because, according to research, her flirting style can give you a major clue about what to expect in the next few hours, days or weeks – and even what you can expect in a long term relationship (if it gets that far).

In fact, one recent study from the University of Kansas in the US identified five flirting styles and even suggested the types of relationships those styles might lead to. So here’s what her flirting might be telling you.

The physical flirt

She may ostentatiously look you up and down. She may punctuate her conversation with a playful hand on your arm or an obvious flick of her abundant blond locks. According to the psychologists at Kansas University, she’s a physical flirt, and her body language speaks volumes.

What it probably doesn’t say, however, is that you have bagged yourself a guaranteed one-night stand. You haven’t. Physical flirts might be happy to show their sexual interest, but that doesn’t mean they’re promiscuous.

She may well fall for your charms, though. According to the research, physical flirts fall head over heels quite easily, and quickly develop an emotional and – when the time comes – sexual connection.

And don’t be blinded by prejudice. Physical flirts can make for good relationships, even in the long term. Two of the key ingredients of a lasting relationship are sexual chemistry and a strong emotional bond, and physical flirts tend to develop both in abundance.

The traditional flirt

If you think you’ve seen a flicker of interest from a traditional flirt, it’s probably only a flicker. If you’re getting anywhere at all it might be because you’ve known her a long time and you’ve done all the pursuing.

In other words, the traditional flirt believes men should do the asking and women should wait to be asked. If you try other flirting techniques on her – particularly the physical kind – you’re likely to put her off. If she flirts at all it will probably be subconsciously and you’ll have to be aware of some very subtle clues, from a very brief glance in your direction to the shy, nervous fidgeting that can at least indicate interest.

How will a relationship play out? Well, you won’t have to worry about her flirting with other men. Aside from that, she’ll value the security you offer and may well be quite introverted, preferring a cosy night in with you to raucous parties or nightclubs.

The polite flirt

The polite flirt knows the rules. You’re more likely to have to approach her and you’re unlikely to feel the spark of sexual chemistry if you do. It might be there, but she’ll be careful not to let it show.

She probably won’t be cold or standoffish, mind, particularly if she likes you. She’ll engage in lively conversation. She’ll laugh at your jokes. She may swap numbers or email addresses at the end of the night.

But her flirting is likely to be non-sexual in the first instance, and she may seem a little reserved. Her manners will be impeccable but telling her that her eyes sparkle like the brightest stars in the firmament is unlikely to do you any favours. She doesn’t flirt ostentatiously and she’s not flattered by the ostentatious flirting of others.

The good news is that, according to the Kansas research, polite flirters “do tend to have meaningful relationships”. She might be hard work at the outset, but she may well be a loving and loyal partner.

The sincere flirt

There’s no game-playing with the sincere flirt, and no danger that her interest in you will only be sustained until you stop buying the drinks. If you’ve known her a while and she’s said yes to a date, it’s unlikely that she’s agreed on a whim or that she’s going into it half-heartedly. She’s checking you out as serious potential mate material.

So how do you identify a sincere flirt? Well, she might show a lot of interest in your life, work and interests. She will ask questions and be attentive to answers.

She wants to make an emotional connection and will let you know that she’s interested (if she is). So expect her to be open, honest and straight down the line. Her flirting style might not be playful or full of sexy hints and innuendo, but it will be genuine. She won’t do anything purely for effect.

Happily, she may carry that emotional honesty into any ensuing relationship. So if you don’t mess her around, she won’t mess you around, either.

The playful flirt

She’s great fun to be around and her playful, sexy flirting style can send a young man’s imagination into overdrive. You may be very glad – at first – to have chanced upon the most playful female flirt in the bar.

But be warned, the playful flirt is the diametric opposite of her sincere counterpart. She may very well flirt with you or say yes to a date on a whim. She may laugh at your jokes and compliment your style without even considering you as boyfriend material. Her flirting might suggest otherwise, but you’d be wrong to think there’s any future to your encounter beyond the next 10 minutes.

The fact is, playful flirts enjoy flirting. It’s not a means to an end (be that sex, a romance or a relationship), it’s an end in itself. They find it a fun way to spend an evening, partly because of the boost it gives to their own self-esteem. She’ll love your obvious sexual interest, but perhaps not in the way you’d hope.

And any ensuing relationship? Frankly, it’s highly unlikely there’ll be one. If there is, it will probably be fleeting and shallow. Which is fine, of course, as long as you’re not expecting a whole lot more.

If the scientists are right, you really can gauge her wants and desires from the way she flirts. Pick up on the clues early and you could save yourself a lot of heartache, or stop your own flirting style from driving a potential long-term lover away.

Source: http://him.uk.msn.com/sex-and-dating/how-to-decode-her-flirting

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Two Romantic Dreams in Two Nights


For the first time I have had ‘Two Romantic Dreams in Two Nights’. This is very strange because I have done nothing unusual to encourage those type of dreams. I can’t remember much now but I know the dream I had last night was romantic, involved cuddling, kissing, holding hands and staring into each others eyes. I don’t even have a girlfriend to encourage that sort of dream.

It was the same the night before it and I got up all happy and loving life even though I’m going through some bad times. I think I can pinpoint the cause of being positive, happy and confident for these few days. For a while I had been kind of alone because I had lost a best friend who was a girl and for me a girl-friend is very important. Girls who you are friends with are more understanding, sensitive and caring than guys. They also like shopping and having a meal occasionally and this is what I enjoy too so it’s important I have caring friend who is a girl.

Anyways that best friend found a guy in her life and forgot about the friend who was there for her when she was sad or happy. Recently I have connected with a friend very well and this was through a social network. Now we even have each others numbers and we text on a daily basis and make each other smile with some banter. Her positive attitude and much love and care for me has most likely changed my life. I’m more happy with life when I actually might have been depressed because of my current situation. This special friend has been very good to me and I appreciate her a lot and she is the only reason I can think of for having romantic dreams.

This does not mean I’ve fallen in love with her but it indicates that when someone cares about you so much and makes you smile it can change you mentally. Changes because of her has made me feel cared about and that is causing me to have these nice romantic dreams. I only wish I could remember who that girl was in the past two dreams.

Women Aren’t “Nice” – Part 7


WOMEN AREN’T “NICE”

It is critical to realise that women are human beings and not made from sugar and spice. They are just as competitive, manipulative, conniving, game playing, merciless, and ruthless, in their quest to get the man of their choice. Once they “get” their man, they will try to control him.

The irony, of course, is that women detest men that can be controlled by women. However, women WILL try to control you. Sometimes, women are only trying to CONTROL you as a TEST: To see if you are THE MAN.

If you permit them to control you, you FAIL the test.

The desire for control, for both sexes, stems from the massive stakes involved, but it’s far more devastating for a man to submit to control. It destroys his sexual attractiveness.

For a man, it’s always self-destructive for him to submit to any control whatsoever, no matter what the woman’s reason is for attempting to control him. And no matter what, a man ALWAYS ends up coming out more attractive by not submitting.

Since women are not “nice” and since they will attempt to control you with ingenious tactics, it is imperative you keep your guard up and not let any power or control slip through your fingers.

One of the most tragic mistakes a man can make is to let a woman know that something she did actually bothered him at all.

You MUST understand that there is just too much at stake for both men and women to play nicely “by the rules”.

If you let a woman know that something she did hurt you, she will simply use that knowledge AGAINST you, to CONTROL you.

She will try to see how far you will go, in terms of kissing her ass, to try to prevent her from doing it again. And most guys resort to this pathetic bribery. It’s as if these guys are saying, “I’m kissing your ass so you will like me enough to not do that mean thing again.”

An example of this phenomenon is when a man tells a woman that it bothers him when she talks rudely to him. Then, not only does he now seem needy, which is unsexy, but also, she can then use extortion in subtle ways. For example, she might hint that you should do this, that, and whatever else for her or she might do the hurtful thing again.

She may use psychological warfare, and act kind of distant, to see how scared you are of her repeating this behaviour, and what you will do for her to prevent it.

You must not accept ANY crap from any woman, EVER.

As soon as she acts up, you must show how calm you are as you deliver the punishment, the figurative SPANK.

This way, she will sense that it is HER problem, not yours, for acting up.

She will know that you can easily get another, better woman than her.

Of course, if she did anything serious, then dump her and forget about her immediately. ZERO second chances for any real serious shit.

NEVER explain to a woman that she should treat you right.

If she doesn’t know that, DUMP her. She is not worth keeping if she does not treat you right. Tell her not to come back until she shapes up.

And she will usually come running back to you when you throw her to the curb for misbehaving.

It’s called you having self-respect.

And if women sense that NOTHING bothers you, then there is NOTHING they can use against you. And, after testing you to see if you can be hurt or not, and seeing that you indeed cannot, they will usually kiss your feet.

If a woman does not show an immediate massive change, kick her out.

Does that sound like a mean, bitter statement about women?

It’s not. It’s the prescription for reality. 99.999999999 per cent of the time.

You might be tempted after a few good weeks with a woman to think that if she does something out of line, then you could just tell her that what she did hurt. After all, “She loves me, so she wouldn’t want to hurt me again”.

Nope.

If you show her she hurt you, she’ll keep it in her arsenal.

And she will use it again.

Think about it like this: 99.99 per cent of the time, if somebody is being a prick, they know it.

Women know if they are doing something wrong to you.

And if they really don’t know, it’s probably something trivial and not worth you mentioning to her anyway!

So if you DO indicate something hurt you, she will just know how to activate your “hurt button” in the future.

So here’s my recommendation:

Keep your cool at all times.

Don’t let her know that ANYTHING bothers you.

Always, calmly tell her she misbehaved by doing the specific thing she did. Tell her you won’t tolerate it.

But don’t let her feel it actually bothered you.

NEVER argue with her about it. It will NOT HELP, only make things worse. I guarantee it.

Now of course, if you have been with a woman who has been great to you for years, and once in a while she acts up a bit, well that’s perfectly normal you probably aren’t perfect either. You’ve both earned a bit of slack.

There is a BUT, though.

But heed this warning:

Women will sense a guy that they can get to kiss their ass, and will take FULL ADVANTAGE OF HIM till he is barely even a rug to walk over.

And women will deny this till the end of time, even coming up with brilliant “excuses” for their bad behaviour.

Now that you know this, it’s time to stop taking any crap from any woman. You are responsible from now on if you put up with anything that doesn’t feel right.

Think about that the next time you’re about to be “Mr Nice Guy” with any woman. Women understand, relate to, and demand mental toughness more than you realise.

(Notice I used the word mental toughness. Don’t EVER get

PHYSICALLY VIOLENT or even upset with any woman, I’ll explain later why this is so important to your success, and goes way beyond just the law.)

Don’t be Mr Nice Guy. And don’t be Mr Angry. Neither one is cool.

So you know now not to be a nice guy. How exactly should you be?

Pound this short answer into your head: Be “THE MAN”. In the macho, cliché sense.

Oh, I really hope that doesn’t hurt you or insult you.

It shouldn’t, because if you haven’t been THE MAN, it’s not your fault.

For a long time, I didn’t think like THE MAN. It isn’t easy in our inane, politically correct culture.

A lot of guys don’t believe me when I say that being THE MAN, inside, mentally, and even more important, emotionally, is THE VITAL KEY to sparking and sustaining a woman’s desire. These guys think that their looks and money are more important.